Catch up on the escapades of the Sunshine Coast's most notorious soft toy. Don't let the soft, hand-knitted exterior fool you. This monkey is full of vengeance, hatred and could strangle you with his tail. He also likes Pina Coladas and walks in the rain.

Hello there World, This is John Laws. You know, people who know, use Valvoline..... I've been drinking it for years. It's what gives me my bowel-shakingly deep voice. Valvoline... you know what I mea.. *BLAM BLAM BLAM!!*

*Ahem* Sorry about that... won't happen again.

What's happening with you all today? Hope you are all content, with a belly full of food and a groovy tune on your brain. 

I still think i'm recovering from the Sonfest music festival I attended on the weekend. I'm still tired as a toy making elf on Christmas Eve and I think I have some sort of head cold/cough thingo that should be banished immediately to a foreign wasteland. The weekend was awesome and anyone that loved manure-smelling mud or was amphibious would have been in their element for most of the time there. I will tell you in detail about what I loved and hated about the weekend tomorrow possibly. But for now, lets just say that...

  1. Scat are an uber-cool and incredibly funky jazz band from Brisbane that rocked my socks off on three separate occasions over the weekend. Once while they were free-styling it at an improv gig at one of the big tents there, later that night at a chilled-out coffee and supper gig and finally on the last night when we were dancing in the mud and I managed to scat my way through one of their songs to win their latest CD. 
  2. Running down a steep, bitumen covered road at almost full-pace with no shoes on will almost certainly do terrible things to the soles of your feet. I don't mind though. It couldn't really have been avoided.
  3. Christian bands, including hardcore, punk and the odd hip-hop crew can rock out a show just as hard as their secular counterparts can. True Story.
  4. It's kinda strange and pretty exciting to meet someone for the first time and you think that you've known them for years, or maybe sat beside them on the bus to and from Uni for a semester or three. How their face looks so familiar but you can't remember where you've seen them before and they say and do some of the things that you thought only you did.
  5. I can still sing ol' Frankie Blue-eyes' tune "Mack the Knife" just as well as I could five years ago. Maybe even better

Caaaaaa-razy!

Now I was talking to my friend Pia last night and she told me that she'd found a great picture of me that was taken on the Monday afternoon of Schoolies Week down at Mooloolaba Beach. I received this today in my email. I'm not so sure about it being great though. At this reduced size, it looks as though I have some major unexplained swelling happening but it's kinda fun. 

We were checking out the scenery on one of the busiest afternoon/evenings of Schoolies '03 at a nice and cosy picnic table, overlooking the beach, the Police vs Public Volleyball match and the Matrix/Austin Powers movie marathon. A prime spot indeed. It was supposed to be an alcohol-free zone for the time all the 'Schoolies' were in town. That didn't stop us 'Toolies' (about 10 of us) from consuming nearly two cartons of beer and assorted spirits while 'negotiating' with the local Boys In Blue about six times between 4pm and 10pm, assuring them that we were not aware of the bans in place, were not supplying alcohol to minors and were keeping to ourselves and not causing trouble. That, coupled with the stereo hidden in the garden pumping out all manner of perfect party tunes, was the ingredients for afternoon I will never forget. It was like the Schoolies I never had.

Max was having a ball also. He spent the evening chatting up gorgeous beach babes and making out with them under the landing of the Loo-with-a-View. I didn't see much of him.

If you would like to stare all day at the original and bigger picture of me with an apparent deformity on my lower lip, you can download it here.

Believe it or not, I went skateboarding with my nine year old bro today at a bowl near our house. I haven't done that for about eight years and it shows. I now have a nice big round piece of skin missing from my knee and a jarred wrist from my antics. My attempts (read: hilarious failure) at several standard tricks and then the precision completion (read: acting out) of some tricks that not even some highly paid professionals could pull off meant that my bro was practically wetting his pants by the time I had completed my five minute onslaught wearing nothing more than a pair of shorts. He enjoyed himself. Mission Accomplished. (I guess I had fun too!)

I guess I'd better go. I have to work in the morning. I scored a job today working with a surveying company for a while. I wont be anything i'm not used to. It's been raining still and i'll be working outside on building sites and the like. Mud. You gotta love it!

Word to ya mutha, y'all.


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