Catch up on the escapades of the Sunshine Coast's most notorious soft toy. Don't let the soft, hand-knitted exterior fool you. This monkey is full of vengeance, hatred and could strangle you with his tail. He also likes Pina Coladas and walks in the rain.
Theophilus Thistler's Articles
September 7, 2005 by Theophilus Thistler
Well Hello There!

I'm alive and have to work in 4 hours but things could never have been better. Ever, I think.

I got my hair cut last tuesday by a gorgeous girl named Emily. I was in the salon over three hours. We spoke for most of that. It was the easiest conversation I'd had with a stranger, ever. And this was a girl. And this was my vision of reality perfection. Absolutely beautiful.

Black haired beauty, alt/indie princess who (because she is a world class hairdresser) has a funky ...
April 3, 2005 by Theophilus Thistler
Some cold-hearted, ignorant, egotistical butt-munches need to be slapped in the face with a bunch of cold fish by a legion of foot soldiers. Twice.

That is all.
March 31, 2005 by Theophilus Thistler
You know, I think i'm getting really good at hiding the way I feel about her. Hiding my smiles, my outbursts of ecstatic energy, hiding how much I really enjoy her company. Not telling her "I really like those earrings!", "Cool shoes man!" or maybe "Arrrr! Nice Eyepatch! (You look really pretty tonight)". How much her bright eyes and big smiles make me all....

Tonight was weird, grood, great & good, surreal, delicious, heart-racing, brain scattering and overall, funtastic Not as many flames ...
October 5, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
What a shame!

One of the guys I grew up listening and laughing to, and still do on occasion, has died after having troubles recently with his heart. Best known for his gags involving the line "I dont get no respect!", he has been in and out of the entertainment/comedy industry since he was 19. Countless appearances on the Tonight Show, SNL, Johnny Carson and numerous movies such as National Lampoon's Caddyshack , Adam Sandler's 'Little Nicky' plus a standout role in Oliver Stone's Natural Bor...
September 29, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
Walking down the street you almost break your neck as you see some young pretty little thing wearing what could best be described as an early version of the bikini. Midriff showing, bare back, big boots or heels, boobs bouncing all about… and the skirt!… or should I say belt?

You all know who I’m talking about. They are affectionately known as skanks, ho’s, white trash, porn stars and probably other names as well, but I don’t really want to dwell on it. The kind of girl that your eyes are pos...
August 23, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
Final Score: 108.5


I made a few silly mistakes... and some were just a bit too vague for me to guess... but I'm happy with the result.
August 10, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
It's true!

Jesus is the most disturbing & unsettling person I have in my life... but I wouldn't have it any other way!

He provokes & intrigues, convicts & redeems. It's also the most fulfilling friendship I have. He validates my life.

Talk to Him sometime! He always listens. Sometimes He even talks back...
August 1, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
Well... I just commented on Mugz' latest article.

Like I said, it's kinda strange when you voice inner opinions or give insight to your psyche that would probably otherwise be unnoticed by possibly even your closest friends. But then again... this is really what I started blogging again for. To learn more about myself and maybe bounce a few things off other people.

I've said this to a few people recently but I didn't really mean i...
July 13, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
And this week, the peeps over at Homestarrunner.Comhave showered us with the pleasure of a load of 'Christmas Decemberweenin July' goodies! There's a newemail from Mr Bad himself, extreeeeeeeme randomness from SweetCuppin' Cakes, a new narrated Kid'sBook and *gasp* a special installment of TeenGirl Squad!
July 12, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
BAH! I can't believe the stuff I let myself do or not do, just to get along with people. The places I go, the things I miss out on and the stuff I give just to keep things running smoothly in my mostly hopefully (but usually hardly) perfect life.

For starters, late Friday afternoon I get a call from my boss' wife saying "Hi Wayne. We won't need you to come in next week to work for us. We have nothing for you to do. Is that ok?" "Sure, sure, that's fine. That'll be cool." I say without even gi...
July 7, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
One month and one day since my last blog. Funny thing, that.


It'd be nice if I had my own computer here. Lots of stuff, cool and crap, has happened but I don't really have the time to tell... sooo.... Suffer in ya jocks! -

Happy 50th Birthday to my Mum though. She's the best mum in the world! The best i've ever had actually . Everyone else should be jealous 'coz I got the pick of the bunch. On ya Mummsy!

My first initial is the only letter in the alphabet that has more ...
June 6, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
It's sweet when you know what you're doing is what God wants you to do. It's even better when it's blatantly evident that the whole deal has been set up by Him in the first place. Every week it seems I witness or hear of another situation where God has directed things to go a particular way where, if it was up to us humans, it would not usually be possible to happen how it did.

Confirmation and encouragement like that goes a long way for this little black duck.

An article by Trinitie was t...
June 4, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
Owie! Stingy! Bad Hurty! My head feels so bad... like there's a bus load of prisoners from a hard labour camp drilling and bashing their way out from inside my head. I hope this goes away pronto! I have stuff to do tomorrow....

Like GO TO TEEGSTAR'S 21st BIRTHDAY PARTY!!!!!! Uber-W00tness!!!!

It'll be radtacular! I can't wait! I'm not in the best frame of mind right now but I just wish Miss Teegstar all the best for the next 48hours... I reckon we'll be partying about that long Well I hop...
May 26, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
Tinkering around the rolling expanses of the Internet this morning, I found this interestingly creepy story that grabbed my attention. It seems that a team of surgeons and researchers from the University of Louisville are currently applying to perform the first live human face transplant. Upon approval, they will begin to search and screen for prospective patients for the procedure which will take up to 36 hours in total and just reminds me of that tops movie Face/Off with John Travolta and Nich...
May 25, 2004 by Theophilus Thistler
Yes. It's true. I am currently in a deep slumber as I type this telepathically with my "Luke Skywalker Style" ninja skillz.


Some things about me and stuff at the mo....

I have a job. It's grood. 

My car is almost ready. It likes to spend all my money.

Marshmellows are great when toasted with love or dunked in coffee.

All green jelly beans are gross.

I found out that Trinitie is posting again. Yay! has some new stuff.

"ACHTUNG!Theophilus Th...