Sometimes I just don't understand myself.

Published on March 1, 2004 By Theophilus Thistler In Personal Relationships

I don't understand why I find it SOOO hard to be myself around people that I find fascinating. When I am myself, some people find me fascinating. It is very rare that any mutual fascination happens. If it does, sometimes it isn't long until I am acting weird again. I can't seem to help it. No matter how hard I try! This goes for males as well as females, but it usually is the females I have trouble with.

Maybe it's because I find them to be wondrous and mysterious creatures and I can never figure them out?

Anyone have anything to contribute on this?

Comments

Muggaz

on Mar 02, 2004

I have sooo much to contribute, but my comment would be longer than your article.

Ok, i will try and explain it the simplest way possible. Fascinating people = chcik you want to score with right?

Fascinating people have people approach them all of the time, people pulling lines, whatever, just trying to impress them. One thing that does impress them is when people are themselves and relaxed... this is because they dont see it soo often.

I.E - hot chick in bar, gets guys wanting to buy drinks all the time... but if you go up to her, and you can just start a normal conversation with her, without the notion in your mind that you will fall to pieces if you talk to her, you will be ok.

I had the very same problem as you my friend, but the overall winning concept that helped through was the relisation that no matter how fascinating anyone was, there is always someone more fascinating...and i am probably one of those people! Its all about confidence!

i hope that is helpful.

new-age nomad

on Mar 02, 2004

I feel you bro.... That's an all too familiar feeling. Again, we return to being genuine. It's a vicious cycle ,my friend, that never ends....

Muggaz, I dont' know what you're talking about

imajinit

on Mar 02, 2004

I'm going to take a stab in the dark here, because i don't know if i'm on the same sheet of music that you are.

If I am, this is the way i see it.

You have a 'gauge' in mind by which you rate the fascination level of the people around you. (not necessarily a conscious one) You may or may not use the same 'gauge' to rate yourself. Either way, it sounds like you're judging your own 'fascination' level by comparing yourself to these other people.

if you have a hard time "being yourself" as you put it, then you don't have a very good sense of who you are.

so first things first, figure out who you are. this can take a really long time, so don't think it's gonna happen overnight. once you know who you are, it will be easier to maintain this 'self'.
2nd, stop comparing yourself to other people if you can help it. be comfortable with who you are no matter what.
3rd, if you want to be 'fascinating', seek truth, knowledge, and wisdom... then figure out a way to share it with the world in such a fashion that people will find it interesting.
4 - variety is the spice of life. get involved in as many different activities as possible. Read, study, learn, interact with people. Run, play a sport, get the hell out into the world... exercise your body as you exercise your mind since the two work hand in hand. In addition to your mind and body, there's the incredibly important 'soul'. without it, there is no purpose. learn to take the best care that you can of all three.

that's a little bit of the world according to me... take it for what it's worth

Theophilus Thistler

on Mar 02, 2004

Surprisingly Muggaz, as opposed to you, not everything in my world is related to scoring with chicks. I did mention that this also happens with guys, but no where near as often. Hardly ever. I'm confident also. It just seems that sometimes I have a proverbial brain-fart and I can't think straight.

Imajinit: I don't compare myself with anyone really. Only Jesus. And I never come close. I know exactly who I am and what I am like. I have trouble sitting around and saying nothing. Without even trying I can go on and on and on about myself in an attempt to tell the person as much as I can but I think that I shouldn't because they don't need to know everything all at once. I am a perfectionist at heart and this can involve divulging more information than is needed.

I am totally comfortable with who I am and realise I am not perfect, but I do try and improve myself by trying new things, studying stuff I don't know much about and working on getting rid of bad habits or annoying quirks.

Could it be that they wow the socks off me and I need my socks to think?

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